June 2017

It’s June And Mayweather Already Looks Untouchable

Floyd Mayweather posted a video of his training this morning and it’s safe to say that Conor McGregor will be eating his shit on August 26th. JUST LOOK AT THE GUY! Keep Reading

Starbucks Served Drinks With Poop Bacteria In Them

In news that’s as shitty as it sounds (and yes, picking that low hanging fruit), a BBC investigation found high levels of fecal bacteria in iced drinks at Starbucks located in the U.K. Keep Reading

Rockets Acquire Chris Paul In Mega Trade

In a deal that no one saw coming, the Houston Rockets look to be going for the whole damn thing and just traded to acquire Clippers PG Chris Paul according to ESPN’s Adrian Wojnarowski. Keep Reading

The Cleveland Cavaliers Are An Absolute Dumpster Fire Right Now

This time last summer, The Cleveland Cavaliers were on top of the world and the greatest chapter of LeBron’s legacy had just been written after having resurrected the Cavs from a 3-1 deficit and capping the greatest NBA Finals ever by bringing Cleveland the city’s first championship in over fifty years.

Fast forward one major free-agent signing and a spirit-crushing NBA Finals one year later and the Cavaliers have suddenly transformed into something resembling the shit storm that made LeBron exit to Miami nearly six years ago. Keep Reading

POLL: Where Do You Get Most Of Your RGV News From?

/

Although we’ve made clear our qualms with local news, we’d still like to know where everyone flocks toward to get their local scuttlebutt from.

So, who you got? Keep Reading

San Juan Mayor Mario Garza Quits County Job Hours Before Sheriff Opens Investigation Into His Department

/

Mario Garza, the man who had to go and ruin the perfect name-pairing of San Juanita Sanchez and San Juan, abruptly resigned from his post at the Hidalgo County Adult Probation department after 15 years on the job conveniently mere hours before the Hidalgo County Sheriff’s office opened a bribery and theft investigation into the department. Keep Reading

Did Vicente Gonzalez Give Away Popeyes Chicken For Votes? An Investigation!

/

Vicente “Chente, Con La Gente, Omnipotente, La Puente, Ya Vete” Gonzalez (D-TX) is a few months into his first term representing our 15th congressional district and has already fallen victim of a deliciously succulent, juicy butter biscuit of a rumor and The Bench Wire is here to BLOW THIS MOTHER FUCKER WIDE OPEN! Keep Reading

Every Single RGV School Ranked, 2017

/

Children At Risk, a non-profit watchdog on Texas education, has released their school rankings for 2017 and is here to keep neurotic parents up at night now knowing how shitty their kid’s school really is.  Keep Reading

2017 Best Bars In McAllen Ranked

Can you believe that this will be the third yearly edition of the Best Bars in McAllen?

No. You can’t, because even I didn’t think I’d still be writing this garbage in 2017 but HERE WE ARE!

Keep Reading

Warriors vs Cavs: The Bench Wire 2017 NBA Finals Preview

Welp! Here we are again.
Keep Reading