Monthly archive

August 2017

KRGV Channel 5 Stupidly Created the RGV’s Gas Panic Last Night

in RGV/The News

If you were wondering why on Earth so many people were waiting over 2 hours to pump gas last night, you can thank the producers over at KRGV for unleashing an unnecessary wide-spread panic over a report that likely had nothing to do with the Rio Grande Valley’s gas supply. Keep Reading

SNL’s Conor McGregor Is Damn Near Perfect

in Sports

Reminder: your friends at The Bench Wire will be holding a live-blog of Saturday’s fight starting at 8:00 PM

McAllen’s Proposed New Smoking Ban (And This Email) Can Eat Dick

in Rants/RGV
mcallen city hall

Earlier today, I received a “Fwd” in my inbox, urging others including myself to throw support at a “100% Smoke-Free Ordinance” for the City of McAllen. You may have also received this email today, and perhaps like me also felt the need to vomit moments after reading it. Keep Reading

Geovani Hernandez, Ex-Hidalgo County Sheriff Candidate, Charged In Connection With Drug Trafficking

in RGV/The News
geovani hernandez

Current Progreso Police Department Sergeant Geovani (Not, “Giovani,” Valley Central) Hernandez has been charged with aiding and abetting the trafficking of narcotics stemming from a sting operation lasting between March through July of 2017, as announced in a news release by acting U.S. Attorney Abe Martinez. Keep Reading

Javier “Chicharito” Hernandez Staunchly Defends Carlos Vela’s Decision To Play In The MLS

in Sports

Carlos Vela’s shocking decision to leave his starting position at Real Sociedad, a member of Spain’s highly competitive La Liga, to sign on to play in MLS’s Los Angeles F.C.’s inaugural season in 2018 has brought out the critics in droves. Chicharito, apparently, is having none of it. Keep Reading

Golden State Warriors Will Pursue Paul George In 2018 Because The NBA Is Broken

in Sports
Paul George

What the fucking fuck, man? Keep Reading

The Bench Wire Hater’s Guide To The Valley: Pharr

in Rants/RGV
Haters guide to the valley pharr

The Valley is one of a kind when it comes to diversity. From the racist white people, the country-wannabes, the ghetto Hispanics, the snobby Mexicans from Monterrey and the token black person in between. With all that diversity and culture mixing all over, visiting the Valley might be a little overwhelming. Not to worry, tourist: The Bench Wire is here to help.

We’re getting off on Jackson. No, not Jackson but Jackson. Nahh man, THE OTHER FUCKING JACKSON!!!! Welcome to Pharr.

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