Well, now that the glitch in the Matrix has finally been resolved, the universe is back to normal again and we got the Finals rematch we all thought we were gonna get in the first place.
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On Tuesday, the Texas Attorney General’s office denied The Monitor’s request for the City of McAllen to disclose how much they paid Enrique Iglesias for his performance at December’s Christmas Parade concert.
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Earlier this week, Pharr’s City Commission voted to ban indoor smoking in all public places including bars and restaurants and The Monitor’s editorial board ate that shit up.
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According to a press release by the university, Baylor has fired Coach Art Briles, demoted President Ken Starr (although there were erroneous reports claiming him to be fired) and sanctioned Athletic Director Ian McCaw amid heinous off-the-field issues with players at their football program. Keep Reading
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Four years ago, a 24-year old Kevin Durant, a 24-year old Russell Westbrook, and a 23-year old James Harden were just 3 games short of an NBA title. Granted, they would have had to have upset a LeBron and Wade led Miami Heat team in it’s 2nd year in the Finals, so no one really expected the Thunder to hoist the trophy in the end, but damn were they close. Keep Reading
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Nearly 11 months after he announced his candidacy for President, which featured controversial statements about illegal Mexican immigrants that set the tone for the rest of his campaign, Donald Trump has all but clinched the Republican nomination. Keep Reading
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Vicente Gonzalez, a cardboard cut-out who wants you to know that he exists, has now spent over $1.6 million dollars for the right to be named our US Representative. So, let’s talk about that for a second. Keep Reading
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In probably the saddest story you’ll read about today, former #1 pick JaMarcus Russell is scrapping the bottom of every barrel he has in front of him to get himself back into the league. The ex-Oakland Raiders QB recently told Sports Illustrated that he would “play for free” for any team that gave him a shot.
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The Valley is one of a kind when it comes to diversity. From the racist white people, the country-wannabes, the ghetto Hispanics, the snobby Mexicans from Monterrey and the token black person in between. With all that diversity and culture mixing all over, visiting the Valley might be a little overwhelming. Not to worry, tourist: The Bench Wire is here to help.
We meant to drive to South Padre Island but missed the TX-100 exit and ended up in a 2nd world country instead. Welcome to Brownsville.
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Carl’s Jr, known for their tasteless ads AND food, wants to open up a fully-automated restaurant with no human employees because fuck you. Keep Reading