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The Bench Wire Hater’s Guide To The Valley : San Benito

The Valley is one of a kind when it comes to diversity. From the racist white people, the country-wannabes, the ghetto Hispanics, the snobby Mexicans from Monterrey and the token black person in between. With all that diversity and culture mixing all over, visiting the Valley might be a little overwhelming. Not to worry, tourist: The Bench Wire is here to help.

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The Bench Wire Hater’s Guide To The Valley: South Padre Island

The Valley is one of a kind when it comes to diversity. From the racist white people, the country-wannabes, the ghetto Hispanics, the snobby Mexicans from Monterrey and the token black person in between. With all that diversity and culture mixing all over, visiting the Valley might be a little overwhelming. Not to worry, tourist: The Bench Wire is here to help.

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Worst RGV High School Football Teams Week 9

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While we already have PLENTY of rankings of the top teams in the Valley from the Monitor, RGV Sports, (S)TD Dave, etc. the Bench Wire believes that EVERYONE needs their chance in the spotlight…even our comically terrible teams.

YOUU GUYSSS!!!! We only have two more games after this! =( Still plenty of time to get out of the suck! For the first time, we have an additional 6th team!!!!!

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Channel 5’s Kirk Chaisson Arrested…Again

The Valley’s favorite faded reporter, Kirk Chaisson was arrested Wednesday night in Weslaco for fleeing the scene of an accident. KRGV, unsurprisingly, had the scoop:
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Worst RGV High School Football Teams Week 7

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While we already have PLENTY of rankings of the top teams in the Valley from the Monitor, RGV Sports, (S)TD Dave, etc. the Bench Wire believes that EVERYONE needs their chance in the spotlight…even our comically terrible teams.

Only 1 more month left for High School football =( (i mean, c’mon guys, no one in the Valley will be playing passed mid-November)

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Worst RGV High School Football Teams Week 6

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While we already have PLENTY of rankings of the top teams in the Valley from the Monitor, RGV Sports, (S)TD Dave, etc. the Bench Wire believes that EVERYONE needs their chance in the spotlight…even our comically terrible teams.

Yeah, we had a Bye week last week..whatever.

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Worst RGV High School Football Teams Week 4

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While we already have PLENTY of rankings of the top teams in the Valley from the Monitor, RGV Sports, (S)TD Dave, etc. the Bench Wire believes that EVERYONE needs their chance in the spotlight…even our comically terrible teams.

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Worst RGV High School Football Teams Week 2

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While we already have PLENTY of rankings of the top teams in the Valley from the Monitor, RGV Sports, (S)TD Dave, etc. the Bench Wire believes that EVERYONE needs their chance in the spotlight…even our comically terrible teams.

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McAllen DEA Agent Charged With Child Porn

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FBI and federal court documents confirm that McAllen DEA Agent James Patrick Burke has been charged with accessing child pornography after FBI raided his home on Friday.

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Bad Ideas For When It’s Hot As Balls In The Valley

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It’s hot. You know this. I know this. Tim Smith can shove it. “Well, looks like it’s gonna be annuuuuuuther steamer outside!” Just stop. With weather like this, I don’t know how cool weather and lack of sunlight can make anyone depressed. I’m calling bullshit on seasonal affective disorder because I can not remember feeling better about my outlook on life, going outside to 100 degree heat and thinking “Gosh, I love how the suns rays are making my skin cry tears of joy ALL OVER my body! I LOVE you, my scorching hot devil ball of pain 🙂 🙂 ! ”

No.

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